Past Life Bleedthroughs — Just One More Confusing Aspect of this Current Reality
“You were just waiting for me to come along and save you,” he said, right before taking a swig out of his pint glass as his eyes smiled at…
“You were just waiting for me to come along and save you,” he said, right before taking a swig out of his pint glass as his eyes smiled at me.
And in that instant, I suddenly felt completely altered. One minute we were having a beer together after my shift, talking about why it is I had worked so long for someone who did not value me until he came in and replaced him, the next I was processing multiple timelines in what appeared to be a single moment in time. Of course, I did not know that was what was happening back then. What I thought had happened was that I had just fallen in love, suddenly, with someone I had known for almost a year.
I drove home and the feeling diminished a bit as my mind took over. “Good,” I thought to myself. “He’s my boss, not available, and it’s completely inappropriate.”
As I was falling asleep that night his face popped into my mind. The feelings from earlier started to return. I then watched as the face I knew suddenly morphed into someone wholly different. He was much younger, with a mustache, dark-haired and blue-eyed. He swung himself up onto his horse, leaned down, and kissed me. I was young, early 20's, blonde, slender, wearing a pink hoop-skirted dress, and I was pregnant. Off he rode, in his confederate uniform, and I never saw him again. I felt the immense heartache, the grief, the loss, as I remembered.
I awoke the next morning with a vague sense of………….something?? Later, at work that afternoon, as soon as I set my eyes upon him, the whole feeling experience came rushing back. The feelings, not the actual details of the memories. Those would take some time to once again retrieve.
This was the fall of 1996. A couple of days earlier I had first established contact with my guide Mirando, and I had just started to consciously access my records in bits and fuzzy pieces. And now I had found myself thrust into a past life bleedthrough.
“What exactly is a past life bleedthrough”, you ask?
A past life bleedthrough occurs when untransmuted trauma/memories from another lifetime/timeline get activated in this lifetime/timeline, oftentimes by the presence of a soul you traveled with in that other incarnation. Once the trauma is activated and the alternate version of you (ie: the you from that other lifetime) starts to bleed through, it becomes challenging to discern between what is actually occurring on this timeline and what has already occurred on other timelines, or what has been left unresolved from other timelines.
The me, from that civil war lifetime, the me that lost her husband, the me that was still in love with that him, and could not believe she was once again standing in his presence bled through, and this me felt her feelings as if they were my own. The puny power of my third-dimensional mental body was unable to differentiate.
Of course, I did not have that perspective at the time. I just had a vague recollection of another life with him which made me even more certain at the time that he and I were ‘supposed” to be together. It took me many months of walking between worlds to gain the multidimensional understanding. Initially, I was just “in love” and acted out the Earthly drama of unrequited love with him (an oft experienced drama for anyone in the midst of a past life bleedthrough).
This is typically how it goes. One of the parties is aware of the feelings, intensely, strongly aware, and the other person feels a fondness for the first. I mean, how could they not? They are soulmates. And yet because they are not dealing with the same level of trauma/memory, and/or there is no contract or opportunity in place for a relationship to develop, the unrequited love drama plays out, exacerbating the past life bleedthrough, often wreaking havoc and confusion for all involved.
In retrospect, I acted like a complete and total idiot at times, literally chasing after a ghost in another person’s body while inhabited by the love and loss of another from another life. That’s a confusing sentence, right? It’s meant to impart the feeling state of a past life bleedthrough, something you, yourself have probably already experienced.
More often than not, it is the one who was left behind in the other lifetime that is experiencing the bleedthrough in this one. Untransmuted grief and loss is a powerhouse sitting underneath much of the “in love” illusion. And that was exactly what this was. The me from that other timeline was so trapped in grief that she could not tell the this timeline him from the her husband timeline him, and I, well, I just thought I was in love.
How to tell if you are potentially experiencing a past life bleedthrough -
You feel completely overwhelmed by your emotions in the moment. Your emotions from just this moment/lifetime are pretty easy to handle, meaning they have a certain level of density to them. Bleedthrough emotions are like a weight that you’ll feel you have absolutely no control over.
You experience unrealistic expectations regarding someone, something, an opportunity, etc. I used the example of my “in love” state to illuminate just one past life bleedthrough experience. You also may find yourself in the throes of a past life bleedthrough when it comes to any kind of relationship, any expression of your creative energy, a career desire, a particular reaction to a location, any attachment really, whatsoever, can have an element of past lives bleeding through.
Everyone who is around you seems to have a completely different perspective on your situation at hand. Due to the fact that they are not in the past life bleedthrough moment, they have clarity you do not.
You feel as if no one understands you (see #3)
You experience suffering.
You feel powerless.
Fill in your own examples for yourself here. Since you’ve most likely been through at least one already at this point on your journey, reflect on your own experience to help you determine your very own special way of running a past life bleedthrough. You might be saying to yourself right now, “Oh! that’s what that was!”
So, what to do?
What did I do? As I said I pursued the relationship with him in both aggressive and passive-aggressive ways, spent a lot of time out of my body in total fantasy, and created some really great real-time experience and a visceral understanding for my role as a channel and healer, as well as a storehouse of comedic material, if I ever decide to walk that path more fully once again.
Eventually, I moved on to another relationship, the restaurant we had worked at together closed, and things returned to “normal”, meaning the feelings once again went underground.
I saw him a couple of years later and discovered the bleedthrough was still active. This time, however, I did not have the “in love” aspect of the emotional experience. This time it was rage that was activated within me. I breathed my way through it as much as I could, and it dissipated over a few days, sort of, more like weeks. Man, I was pissed!
A few years later, again, the feelings were activated. I don’t even know what it was this time that did it, but there I was, bleeding through. The Pleiadians recommended that I send a transmission of unconditional love through me and to his higher self, unconditional love, not the “in love” thing or the human interpretation of the feeling of love, but instead the energy and density of love itself. I breathed it into my body allowing it to enter my crown and heart chakras and flushed my system with this love. When I felt the chakras in my palms activate, I directed the flow towards him, his higher self.
And I felt free, finally, of her pain, her love, her misery, her rage, her “love”, and her attachment to one who was not “mine” in this life.
If I had had the process of F.O.A.L. back then (see that blog post for the full run down), well that would have done the trick. But I did not. I was stumbling along, awakening, half in and out of my higher awareness with many, many lessons left on my plate.
Unconditional love. It’s always the answer when you’re finally ready for it to be the answer.