Maybe You Can Go Home - Monday Morning/Weekly Check-In Post
How Are You?
On 11/11 before hitting the post button on my last piece Moving Magic-Following the Breadcrumbs I gave Theresa a call to ask her permission about a couple of things I had shared in it.
“I was going to call you!” she started. “I can’t believe you’re calling me right now! We are all together, meaning the whole family, in Northern Minnesota!”
Helena is now 30 years old, and Paul, who lives in Minnesota, is 28.
“I know you’ll never move back to Chicago, but if you need a place to stay for a while or longer while you figure things out, you can always stay here,” she said as I felt myself starting to tear up. I had spent the past couple of days reliving the warmth and beauty of our time in their building while writing about it, and hearing her voice and immediate offer of support reminded me that we do indeed have family.
“Jon and I are open to the whole world right now,” I responded. “I actually have had a voice in my head all week suggesting I call you to see if you have an apartment open.”
“Well, as a matter of fact, Helena will be vacating her apartment on December 1st, so yes, yes we do,” she said, laughing her wonderful laugh. Helena had been living in the first floor apartment for the past few years which is where their whole family lived when we lived in the building. Theresa and Vasken now live in the second-floor apartment, which used to be ours.
“You know we have three dogs now,” I reminded her.
“Yes! Great! Helena is taking Maya (her dog) with her and I have already been feeling sad about not having a dog here.”
I told her that Jon and I would confer and catch up with her again once she was back home in Chicago. He was in his office teaching a Reiki II class.
Ten minutes later he came out on a break and we both sat there crying as I told him about Theresa and her offer. We don’t yet know what we are going to do, but knowing we have this option has flooded us both with feelings of relief and support and more.
So here we sit, one pathway open, and time is currently on our side as we follow the breadcrumbs once more.
I do cry every time I leave the house right now or anytime I talk to anyone and think about leaving this special place, but then I drove downtown on Saturday and it was so crowded that I thought, “I may as well be in Chicago right now”. Ojai is no longer the sleepy, small town it was that we moved to 14 years ago. My tears are about loss, all of it, from what was to what could have been to what never was at all.
How are you today? Please leave me a comment and let me know.
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My first message disappeared as I hit the wrong button. Go where the love is.
I searched the world before I moved to Ok., from Ca. It was the fourth time I moved away from my favorite state.
Cost, illness, family moving propelled me to move again after just four years in my favorite state. Oakland, Berkeley, Mendocino, SF, and lastly Garden Valley nestled between the south and north forks of the American river. Gorgeous and kinda isolated.
I searched the world, Portugal looked great after following a you tube family journeys in the world. What about South America and all those inexpensive places where you could afford a nice house, maybe even a house keeper, which I would drool at the thought of! But, I realized, nooo, not alone and not with certain health needs.
So, the words of my last therapist were in my head, go where the love is.
That happened to be Ok. and my dear friend who loved me and who I loved. She saved me over the phone countless times when I felt so bad I thought I’d die. We became friends from a FB group for autoimmune illnesses, which I’m healing from 🐋🐬.
I moved to Ok., 7 years ago. Was it the right choice?
This is a beautiful environment, but I’m challenged by the far right Christian beliefs here.
I keep grounding love and light, and moving into non judgement and non reactivity which is a challenge. I guess I’m where I need to be!
Go where the love is!
I love this and how having one beautiful option can open the whole world! Looking forward to hearing where the breadcrumbs lead. <3 I am having asthma and anxiety and not entirely sure what that's about but taking some downtime in the last week has helped me calm my system.