I’ve got one foot here in the Meiners Oaks neighborhood of Ojai and one foot on Oakley Street in Chicago, and I am not fully plugged in anywhere. We are shedding and literally shredding years and years of belongings and paper and just stuff, so much stuff. I’ve jammed our paper shredder four times already, and it’s currently cooling off after overheating.
It’s exhilarating and disorienting and scary.
This house is no longer our home, but we’re still here ‘til May 1st, and our (for pretty sure) new home is our old home from twenty-one years ago. I could not have scripted this if I tried. This magic has a life of its own, and Jon, the dogs, and I are along for the ride.
When I look back on some of my earlier essays here on Susbatck I can see that I was already writing about this move without knowing at the time what the specifics of the moment were while yet knowing the moment was one of transition. This is how being psychic, tuned-in, etc can be at times, a knowing without knowing the details of the knowing.
I dreamed about my paternal grandmother ten years ago. She apologized to me for not passing on to me her knowledge about being psychic while she was still alive. She died shortly after I turned thirty just months after I established conscious contact with my spirit guides on my own. I had never known her to be psychic while she was alive nor even interested in metaphysics, so the dream/visitation (for it certainly was a visitation) did not make much sense to me at the time.
On Friday we celebrated a friend’s birthday and while there, with her and her friends and family, embraced in their warmth, she asked me how I was feeling about living near my father once more. He is in the suburbs of Chicago.
“Conflicted,” was my response, offering many more details to her than I will here as this is a story for another time.
The next morning I got an email from my father wishing me a Happy New Year, sharing a story in it about a psychic connection he experienced along with the information that my grandmother, Jenny, his mother, often experienced psychic and clairvoyant phenomena herself as did others in her genetic line. He also signed the email, “Love, Dad”, something has not done, maybe, ever in an email before. I hardly ever receive emails from him and when I do they are usually just a mass email he’s sending out to whatever list of his he has me on.
So, I can only assume that he’s picking up on my potential move without knowing that’s what he’s picking up on.
I saw a friend today at the Farmers’ Market and she let me know that she is aware of four different people who moved away from Chicago and are all now returning. This reminds me of the many readings I gave to people in Chicago early on in my career while reading Tarot at Healing Earth Resources. I would see that they were new to Chicago and let them know that one of the actual reasons they had landed there was to benefit from the magic of Lake Michigan.
I do believe this portal along with the love of our chosen family living on Oakley is summoning us back. Theresa made me a video tour of the apartment for visioning purposes since it’s been twenty years since we’ve been there. It was super fun to walk through that space with her narration behind it.
I was trying to make a plan before arriving there as to how long we would want to be there, and she said, “Look, I think you should just come and be here and then figure it out, however long that takes.” Their support is unconditional. I keep wanting to apologize. I have to stop myself from doing that and simply say, “Thank you”. I am in unfamiliar waters here.
On Saturday, Pluto and the Sun move into Aquarius. I have some very dear friends with sun in Capricorn, so please don’t take this personally when I say that sun in Capricorn for this sun in Aquarius being is always a hard haul. The same is true for Jon. Positive January this past week was not as smooth as the last two were. Someone was in a mood (not me), but someone else reacted to his mood (me).
Imma gonna have a dance party on Saturday.
How are you??? Please drop me a comment below and let me know.
Physically exhausted as f***, yet feeling lighter inside, thank god. Achieving some small goals in physically manifesting reality that are very encouraging to continue the experiments. Getting great support from the new online family and building connections with my small family in the physical. Very satisfying gains I'm so glad the Capricorn sun is moving away from my rising I think I can already feel the new aquarian energies coming on in sun and Pluto and what a relief. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yEijsF3uS-c
Nora, I am probably a decade older than you, and I find that I have a strong urge to go "Home", hence my strong pull to Ireland. I was born in NYC but after my mother died when I was 14, my good Jewish father moved us all ( 6 kids ages 6-16) to rural Ireland. 1972, seemed like the USA in the fifties. I was in exile there, I lost my mother, my friends, my country, my country club. And I got out of there as fast as I could, leaving Ireland when I was 16. I met Michael when I was 19 and brought him "home" to meet my Dad. And we very rarely went back until about 12 years ago, ( I might have been the age you are now). I was a little confused as to where was "home", NYC or Ireland, but no family or friends were in NYC anymore. We started going once or twice a year for very extended stays. My father died in 2002, which made visiting much easier. And now when I am there I know I cleared any trauma, it took a few visits where I had almost an exorcism of pain, and now I am free and thankful that my father brought me to that beautiful landscape, and friendly intelligent, kind people. I almost have one foot in the door here and one there. I am very happy these days. About 5 minutes before I read this check-in post, I clicked the send button to my very first writer's grant application, which has taken me 10 days to write. This girl is on fire! I'm smiling. I love you!! P.S. Positive month is working, yes, there are a few tiny glitches, but I stop myself before the positive vibes disappear. And the element of SURPRISE is in the house.... Surprise! I wrote a grant!